The engagement started with a decommission notice on a system nobody had fully mapped.
The system processed a significant chunk of daily financial data. A risk management platform, wired deep into a legacy mainframe that was still very much alive, and very much a black box. Outside that mainframe sat a single overbloated component doing the work of several, holding the integration layer together through years of accumulated dependencies nobody had ever fully mapped.
Consulting rule #1: Smile, nod, and translate chaos into meaning.
Rule #2: Don’t let your sarcasm show.
Rule #3: Break Rule #2 when appropriate.
Trying to be client-friendly while carrying a sarcasm habit is like juggling flaming swords in a library: impressive if it works, disastrous if it doesn’t.
This is my daily dilemma: I’m in a customer-facing role, but my personality leans dry, cynical, and borderline allergic to buzzwords. I can steer through three political minefields per call and blueprint clarity from chaos, yet it still leaks out like House M.D.’s smirk when calling out bullshit.
If, after quitting your job, you hear or get notified about your ex-leader doing these :
These behaviours scream insecurity, selfishness, and a lack of confidence in building and retaining talent. They crush team morale, erode trust, and send a clear message to the rest of the team: ‘You’re disposable too.’
“I hate and categorically refuse quick wins”, I angrily yelled.
The managers in the meeting jumped. They weren’t used to seeing me lose my zen and calm temper so often.
“I have a huge ethical problem with this organisation’s culture of quick wins. We are adding more layers of band-aids before even healing the scares”, I continued.